my world, my true

Time is flying by. Little Lately is already 5 months old, finding her voice, sitting up and reaching for the stars. Her laugh is a squeal of delight that she’s begun to let out more often these days. Chasing her brother up the stairs or through the yard, kicking and splashing in the bathtub, peeking behind a pillow to find me and of course, getting tickled right in the tiny spot above her ribs are all sure-fire ways to catch the perfection that is her giggles. 

My favorite time of the day with her is bathtime, because it’s her favorite time of the day. She starts kicking her feet like crazy as soon as I start running the water and breaks down in tears when I move her to the other room to undress her, then kicking all over again when we return to the bathroom and her prayers are answered. She gets water EVERYWHERE because she kicks and moves around so much, she’s so excited about it, she even almost pulled herself to standing in her little baby bathtub trying to reach a cup of water the other day!

Speaking of movement, she’s not holding back in that department. She wants to GO. She’s sitting up pretty much independently, although she’s still a little wobbly, she can hold her balance and catch herself when she starts to lean in one direction but she does still teeter and fall every now and then. She’s just so, so strong, though, it’s crazy. She’s got the fiercest grip which she uses to her advantage when her brother tries to snatch toys away from her, and also to get him back for said snatching by grabbing ahold of his curls if they are anywhere within her reach.

And, ladies and gentlemen, Lately has found her voice. Oh my, has she ever. As a baby and young child, I was nicknamed “Yellin’ Ellen” by my family members thanks to all of the racket I made when things weren’t going my way (which was pretty much all of the time, according to them); so Lately has come by this skill honestly. Sometimes she will just sit there, playing with a toy and scream for no reason at all, just to test it out, I suppose. Other times, her scream is used to let me know I’m not going fast enough for her. She’s perfected the fake cry and gets it worked up in no time…and I’m a huge sucker for it, too, fake as it may be.

It’s hard to believe it’s been 5 months. 5 months ago we became a family of four, but it sure feels like she’s been here all along.

Well, it’s official. Lately, or, “baby” (as she’s become known around our house) is growing up too fast. She’s only 4 months old and the child is on the move. She rolls all over the place and is (no joke) starting to try to push herself forward using her knees and toes when she’s on her belly. I can only assume this is a precursor to crawling. Knox skipped that whole phase, so I can’t be sure, but it sure seems like she’s working pretty hard to get that little body moving. When she’s not on the floor playing, she like to be propped up on her little wobbly feet, one of which turns under but that’s not stopping her from wanting to be standing up and bearing all of her weight on those chubby chunky legs of hers. This baby is ready to sit, too. She refuses to recline against a surface behind her. If you try to sit her in a seat or on a couch, she struggles the entire time to lift her head and chest to a sitting position (even in her car seat!). She must have some crazy abs beneath all that flubber. She can actually balance pretty well if you position her to sit, though she leans all the way forward since she can’t hold her head and chest up just yet. I’m really wishing she would just continue being immobile for much much longer. I’m just not ready for all that goes with having a baby who can get around on her own. 

She has also entered the GRAB! phase. She wants everything she sees in her tiny fist. She’s just started to be able to hold on to ring toys and loves her other grasping toys. She wants every glass of water I ever hold and loves to try to take the cup away from me when I’m rinsing her in the bath. She’s starting to eye Knox’s little toys & he’s not taking too kindly to that so far. Her grasp is so strong, though, that he actually has a lot of trouble snatching things from my feisty little gal. 

Her little personality is perky and precious. She has little hyper periods of time when her top lip pokes out and she makes the cutest little coos and squeaks. Her laughs are reserved for those who work to earn them, but she gives her bubbly smiles away all day long. She seems to like everyone she meets and doesn’t mind being doted on by new people who want to give me a break and hold her for a while, as long as she gets to be a part of the action. 

I’m loving watching her develop into a little lady. She loves to be close to me and hates being left out. She still spends a lot of time on my hip, watching my every move with wide-eyed curiosity and wonder. Her face lights up when she wakes up and sees mine and I can’t help but feel the same way.

Slow down, baby girl, I’m enjoying and savoring your isty bitsy days…

Today was a happy day. This morning, the kids & I left the house early and were able to drop Tarrell off at work (he typically walks). On the short drive to his office, Knox asked for a song that Tarrell had made up for him a few weeks ago. So, we sang the song loudly from the front seats & Knox giggled with delight from the back.

When we arrived at the office, instead of kicking the seat and protesting in high-pitched squeals like he normally does, Knox pleasantly said, “bye bye, Daddy. I wuv you!” as Tarrell closed the car door to leave us. I wanted to reward Knox for displaying such distinguished behavior and found my opportunity minutes later when he requested to hear the song we had been singing. He wanted to “hear it in da car” (which is means he wants it played on the speakers, as opposed to having it sung by me). Since the song was a Tarrell original, there would be no searching YouTube on my iPhone to play it for him. So, I decided to call Tarrell & let him know he had a special request from his biggest fan. I plugged the phone into the adapter & without hesitation, Tarrell began to sing loudly,

There’s a dinosaur at the beach and everybody knows.

There’s a dinosaur at the beach & everybody knows…

That he’s gonna eat your toes when you go!

Today was of those days when I realized how very blessed my children and I really are. As I listened to his sweet voice resounding from my car speakers, happy and without reservation, I had a brief feeling of deja vu as I remembered the numerous times I had daydreamed of my future husband, the would-be father of my children, doing things just like this.

My college room mate, Mary & I used to “test” potential love interests by playing a sort-of game with them called “Is He a Good Dad?” The test is hard to describe in writing, but basically we would do a very odd dance move we invented and ask the guy to imitate us. This game stemmed from our idea that good parents play along with their children’s shenanigans no matter how ridiculous they may look doing so. So, if the guy imitated our crazy moves, he received the “good dad” seal of approval. You have no idea how many guys we confused (and probably scared away) by performing this test, but you would also be surprised to find out that there were very few who passed.

Today, the man I chose to marry (who passed this test years ago), sat at a desk in front of a computer, in a thinly walled room adjacent to his co-workers and sang out to his son because there’s nothing more important to him than seeing Knox happy, or than giving Knox the security and fulfillment that comes with having a Dad who listens to you and compromises himself for your sake. And Tarrell didn’t even think twice about it. It just came naturally to him. Just a small thing, a tiny moment that I will cherish forever, one that made Knox’s day…and ultimately has made my life.

Have I mentioned recently that I have a 2 year old? I’m sure many parents have compared life with a toddler to a roller coaster ride, and these days, I can’t help but echo that sentiment. Melodrama and overreaction are constant. He would rather watch TV than hang out with me. He ignores nearly every request I dare to utter in his direction, yet demands my full attention when he wants it. He lies, pushes me past my limits and tests every ounce of patience I own. And when he looks into my eyes and tells me he loves me…amnesia strikes and I melt into a weepy, guilt-filled puddle. It’s pretty emotionally draining and I’m often reminded of what it felt like to be an insecure teenager dating a selfish 17 year-old boy.

Ironically, I’m now in charge of making sure that my child doesn’t turn out to be that awful boyfriend. Perpetually seeking effective ways to approach misbehavior, I sometimes find myself questioning every move I make while trying desperately to provide consistent and constructive discipline. 

I’m quickly starting to realize that getting through the exasperating times means savoring and not losing sight of the amazing ones. It means understanding that he is two, doing my best not to over-analyze his behavior, giving him room to release his frustration appropriately and opportunities to succeed while also allowing him to fail with grace, humility and company.

Taking a deep breath during a tantrum and instead of seeing a screaming mess, trying to look beyond the piercing squeals and finding the little boy who insists on having me all to himself at bedtime, lying on his bedroom floor as he runs his fingers through my hair and requests my rendition of “Rainbow Song” (Somewhere Over the Rainbow) over and over and over again - this has made the tough times easier.

This same little person, who intentionally threw a wooden box at my head just minutes before, became so instantly enchanted by his first look at a ballerina in a music box that he could not resist smothering the tiny dancer in kisses. He’s unbelievably wild yet perfectly gentle. He’s as extreme in his distaste for sharing with his friends as he is in his love for them. He’s getting big but he’s still so, so small. He’s suddenly autonomous and simultaneously entirely dependent upon me. His wails often end in laughter and his cries in tears of joy…and it’s all just part of the ride.

So, I think that the next time he refuses to nap and is bouncing off of the walls all afternoon, instead of grinding my teeth in annoyance, I will smile and remember that in a few hours, he will be so tired that he will let me rock him to sleep for the first time in a long, long time…and that, as soon as he’s asleep and I gently close his bedroom door, I’ll immediately miss him so much I’ll wish he’d wake back up and climb into bed with me.

Since Knox has officially completed his diapering cycle now (newborn to potty training), I figured it would be a good time to review and share our cloth diapering experience (perhaps in the hopes of inspiring some of you to try it yourselves). I spoke briefly about this topic in a guest post I did for my friend Charlotte’s blog (which you should definitely check out if you haven’t already), but I thought it might be helpful to do a more in-depth review of specific brands we used. I remember being extremely overwhelmed by the amount of information I found on the internet about cloth diapers when I first began researching them. There are so many different types and brands, not just of diapers, but of detergents, cleaning methods, sizes, the list goes on and on. I’ll try to keep it as simple as possible for those of you considering making the switch. This will just be a basic review of the types & brands of diapers we have used.

When I was pregnant with Knox, I began to invest in diapers based on reviews I read on the internet and discussions with people I knew who had experience with it. Everything I learned led me to this website, which carries lots of different brands and has a great Q&A page. I purchased (or registered for & was gifted) a few different types of diapers in small quantities to try. I figured I could sell back the ones I didn’t love through a website like this, but I ended up being really glad that I purchased all of the ones I did and have used them all quite regularly, especially now with our second baby.

This was my very first diaper stash:

Econobum - I chose these because according to my research this was the cheapest way to cloth diaper.

12 100% unbleached cotton diapers + 3 one size waterproof covers = $48.95.

Review: These diapers are VERY bulky. Knox looked absolutely ridiculous in them until he was probably 6 or 7 months old, and, even then, it’s tough to button a onesie over them or fit jeans on top of. However, I rarely experienced leaks in these diapers (probably due to their size) until Knox was walking, in which case, if he had a particularly large mess in his diaper, there might be a problem, but I’ve found the same to be true with disposables. They are very absorbent and he seemed very comfortable in them.

Flip - I read that these particular diapers were very easy to use, which is why I purchased them (I also got them on sale), along with the fact that they offered an organic cotton insert.

2 one size covers + 6 organic cotton inserts = $59.95 (~$45 on sale)

Review: Though I heard they were known for their ease of use, I didn’t see much of a difference between these diapers and the Econobums. The covers have a slightly better fit, but other than that, they’re practically identical. The inserts are VERY absorbent. I have never experienced a leak using these inserts. They are also just as bulky as the Econobums. You can interchange these inserts and the Econobum prefolds.

I used both the Flip & Econobum covers with a standard Gerber prefold (which is MUCH thinner and MUCH less absorbent) for newborn cloth diapering this time around. They fit wonderfully on a newborn, but need to be changed often, because of the lack of absorbency. But if you think about it, you’re changing newborn diapers all the time, anyway because they poop every 5 seconds, so I didn’t feel like I was changing them any more than I would a disposable diaper. I had to use snappis to keep them in place, which run around $8.00 for a 3 pack.

Bumgenius Pocket Diapers - I picked these because they got very good reviews & seemed to be the most popular brand.

6 one-size pocket cover + 6 stay-dry inserts + 6 stay-dry doublers = $86.90 (this is a buy 5, get 1 free sale price that they offer from time to time). I also bought one All-in-One sized diaper (insert sewn in) and I liked it okay, but it took a lot longer to dry than the pockets, so I never purchased anymore.

Review: These are the diapers I used the most with Knox. I love the way they fit, I love how easy they are to use, I love that the wetness is drawn away from the skin by the pocket cover. Once you stuff them, they work just like a disposable. Here’s the catch - I started out with velcro, which was a mistake. The velcro wore out pretty quickly. When I bought more, I invested in the snap covers, which are much more durable. They are bulkier than a disposable, but not so much that they won’t fit under a onesie or pants. Once you add the diaper doubler they bulk up a little more, but not too much.

After diapering for a while, I decided I wanted to try some new brands that friends recommended or that I had read good things about. Here are some of the other brands I tried.

Happy Heiny Pocket Diapers - I thought they looked really cute in pictures I had seen and I read on a few message boards that they worked well. I purchased them used from this website and I can’t recall how much I spent on them, but I know they sell a 6 pack for $110.00.

Review: I don’t love the fit of this diaper. There is always a gap at the front which can allow for leaks and they sag in the back which has been a problem since Knox has been walking. I won’t use them outside of the house, but since I bought them, I do use them at home and hope they don’t get pooped in.

Gro-Via Shells - Several people I know love these diapers. I bought the shells I have from BabySteals to try them out. I think they typically run about $17.00 for just the shell, then you have to buy the insert, but I think I got 2 for $20.00. I’ve been using inserts from Econobums & Flips as well as Gerber prefolds with them & they’re working great. The fit is amazing and they have really cute designs. I would like to find some of their inserts/soaker pads on sale (they are about $3.00 a piece) to try because they snap directly into the shell.

BabyKicks Fitted Diapers - I want to preface this by saying that I know nothing about fitted diapers & I didn’t really do my research regarding how to use them. I bought just one of these and I didn’t realize you were supposed to use a separate cover with it. Knox was soaked after just one little pee so I got rid of the diaper. I did love the way it fit and the material is so soft & felt great on his skin. BUT, it is $22.00 for the diaper PLUS you need a cover? The price kills this deal for me along with the fact that they are soaked after one use. They are definitely less bulky than Econobums or Flips, but I can’t get over the price.

Best Bottoms - I wanted to try these because they seemed innovative and were advertised as being a combination of all types of cloth diapers. I just bought one to try it.

1 shell + 1 hemp insert + 1 stay dry insert = $16.95 (I think - couldn’t remember if I bought the inserts separately)

Review: I wanted to love these, but I didn’t. The inserts are GREAT. Very absorbent & also thin. I’ve used the hemp one with my Gro-Via shells, but I didn’t like the fit of the Best Bottom shell at all. Way too tight on the legs for my chubby boy. I don’t like putting stay-dry inserts (microfiber) directly against the baby’s skin, either, so I ended up using that one in a pocket cover.

Duca Duca - These were featured on BabySteals & since I already loved pocket diapers, I assumed they would work at least similarly to the ones I had already tried.

I think I got 2 for $20, which included cover & 2 inserts for each one, but I may as well have crumbled the $20 & thrown it in the garbage.

Review: This was by far my worst cloth diaper purchase. I even shared the deal with a friend who was interested in trying cloth & she bought a bunch since they were so cheap. I feel absolutely terrible for telling her about them because they are just awful. Terrible fit, terrible absorbency, terrible quality (the diapers she bought actually started coming apart at the seams after just a couple of washes).

Bonnibums - I got it as a BabySteal (can’t remember what I paid for it).

Review: This diaper looked so cute on Knox, but he only fit in it for about a day. It was marked as a One Size fit, but he was under a year old, about 25 lbs and it barely fit him. I have used it on Lately, though & I really like the fit, not too bulky for a diaper of this type.

Bummis - My sister gave me the 2 Bummis covers I have. I believe she got them second-hand.

Review: They have a great fit. I have used them with Gerber prefolds as well as the diapers that came with my Econobums & Flips & they fit really well. The velcro also seems to be more durable than the BumGenius were. I’ve also used there swimmis swim diapers and they were great as well. This might be the best fitting and most durable diaper cover I’ve tried.

Phew…that was a longer list than I had remembered! I hope this helps some of you trying to figure out what brands to buy, or maybe even inspires someone to switch to cloth. I think it is important to make choices for my family that reflect environmental responsibility and it has also saved us tons of money.

I am considering trying a few new types of diapers for Lately and learning more about different brands, so any suggestions are welcome. I would love to find a brand that is made in the USA.

Do any of you cloth diaper? What were your favorite brands?

Oh, the smiles.

I had forgotten how perfect and priceless little tiny baby smiles are. It’s the first real emotional connection you make with your child and it’s amazing. 

She started smiling a lot a couple of weeks ago and I’ve already figured out all of the things that make her show me those bubbly baby gums. She loves hearing me whistle and loves the breath that blows on her face when I do. Mostly, I just have to say “hiiii” in a really high-pitched voice and she perks right up. The cutest thing is to watch Knox imitate me talking sweet to her. He loves to lie beside her on the floor whispering and talking in a sing-songy voice saying things like “Hi, seet girl!,” and “What’s a matta?,” “Wuv you.” It kills me every time. 

My little Knox-a-saur is 2.years.old. What a day…

love you more than words, little man.

It’s crazy how much changes in just one month. Lately went from being my quiet, sleepy girl to my very loud fussypants. Though she has her rare moments of looking around curiously and silently observing her big, new world, she really seems to just dislike being awake these days. 

She just prefers to be upright on Mommy’s chest (while her little digestive system figures out how to work properly), so she basically lives in the sling or Moby wrap while she’s awake. She sleeps swaddled on her side pretty well, and, she’s actually a pretty good sleeper - that’s one thing she’s stayed pretty consistent about so far (I’m sure I will be putting my foot in my mouth very soon just for saying that!). The past few nights she’s done a 6 1/2 hr stretch after I first put her down at night. She likes to tank up for the 2-3 hours before bedtime - she eats constantly (and whines and cries a lot) and then just passes out for a while.

She’s just started cooperating with me enough to allow us to go out. She really hates the car seat and unless she’s been fed and allowed to sit upright for a good while, she will squeal and squirm until I get her out (she cries so hard it scares me sometimes!). 

One thing that always melts my heart, though, is how she is already responding to Knox. Regardless of how grumpy she is, she almost always tolerates him holding her (which he asks to do A LOT). I can see the sibling bond growing so strongly already and it makes me so excited for the future. 

But, regardless of how upset or fussy she can be right now, I try to remember that she is so new to everything in this world, she’s adjusting to things that I take for granted, like breathing air, even. Her cries break my heart and I can’t bear to let them last too long which is why she’s spending most of her time in the sling while I fall in love completely and hopelessly every time she calms down and lets her tiny head rest safely on my chest, tightly secured to my body and we become one again, like we were just a month ago.

…and my house is completely quiet. Lately just fell asleep in the Moby & Knox is still sleeping. I’m lost. What do I do? I’m literally frozen with confusion (and joy).

Almost 2 years old. As I care for my newborn these days, it is nearly impossible to believe that it has been a whole 2 years since I was doing the same things with Knox. My perfect, strong, beautiful, smart, amazing favorite little boy impresses and inspires me every single day in some new way. His intelligence and continuous thirst for knowledge drives me to learn as much as I can about whatever he wants to know. His gentle, loving nature reminds me to think before I act and softens my sometimes hard heart. His passion for the things he loves gives me the courage to follow my own heart.

We are still living in dinosaur world here in our house. Everything is “roar” this or “roar” that. Playing “roars” is above all other things in his world, the most important thing to him. When someone comes to visit, if they will simply sit on the floor with him and pretend with him, he is in heaven. We build them houses, put them on the trains, cover them with blankets and put them to bed. We pretend to be them, we read about them, we watch them on TV, we draw them, paint them, mold them with play-doh…we all around love dinosaurs. 

He can now identify them and has learned several of their names. He has cute little ways of saying them that make me smile every time. The apatosaurus (or any dinosaur with a long neck) is “Pat.” Stegosaurus’ are called “Stegas.” T-Rex is one that he can say very clearly. He also says “metridon” for the dimetrodon, “randadon” for the pteranodon (probably his favorite at the moment), and “Para” is parasaurolophus. There are several others that he can’t yet pronounce but can identify when I ask him to point to them. He loves to match the dinosaurs to his books and I even found a matching game that he loves. 

Since baby arrived, we’ve been pretty much chained to the house (which I really hope changes soon - we are all going stir crazy!), so the TV has been on a lot more often than I would like. He really enjoys the PBS show “Dinosaur Train” (he calls it “Roar Train”) and I recently introduced him to “The Land Before Time” (he calls it “Big Roars”) series, which I remember loving as a child. I actually showed him both of these a couple of months ago & he seemed scared of them, so it wasn’t until a few weeks ago we attempted again & he seems to have overcome the fear and now is completely obsessed with both of them.

He can now verbalize most of the things he wants or needs but still has a little bit of a temper that comes out when he can’t seem to find the words to do so. He typically overcomes his frustration pretty easily after an extremely loud outburst and, if he’s really mad, he will bite his own hand. He has flung his hand at me & Daddy a few times, almost “hitting” us, but it’s very rare he takes out his anger physically on another person. It is hard to see him when he’s in that state, though - unable to make it better, and knowing that he just has to go through it and figure it out - but I know it’s just part of being an almost-2-year-old and I try not to give it too much attention when it happens.

His long-standing favorite things - books, music, water, treats - are still holding high in the ranks. He also adores “Juice Ice” which is exactly what he says it is, frozen juice in the Zoku popsicle maker. He LOVES his family and has made some special connections in our extended family the older he gets. It’s fun to hear him learn people’s names and ask for them to “come back,” when they try to leave. I like watching him grow relationships. My favorite growing relationship of his, however, has to be the one with his sister, whom he can’t get enough of.

It’s so hard to believe that I will be throwing a 2nd birthday party for him in just 1 month. When I asked him what kind of party he wanted, he surprised me initially by answering “Monkey,” but quickly corrected himself and said definitively, “Roar Party…Treats.” And, of course, if it’s a roar party he wants, a roar party he will get.

I worried and I worried and I worried about how Knox would react to his little sister. This worry plagued me throughout most of my pregnancy, especially towards the end. I imagined him screaming in protest, his whole world flipped upside-down. I assumed I would have no time for him, that our bond would be strained, that the wonderful friendship we had grown over the past 2 years would be so different, that he would no longer be a Mommy’s boy…

Nothing could be further from the truth. From the moment he laid eyes on her, Knox has been nothing but positive, happy, sweet, gentle and completely loving towards Lately. He wants her where he is at all times. There were some scary moments in the first few days home where his bounding toddler body came a little too close for comfort to her delicate newborn head, and, of course, he would squeeze a bit too hard or get a little too close with a very hard, heavy plastic dinosaur…but, for the most part, he has been better than I could have ever imagined. I kick myself for doubting him - how could I forget what an amazing little man I have on my hands? How could I not know he would love her endlessly and be her protector? He has made me so proud.

The things he says to her are so cute. My favorite so far is “Cool dress, baby!” But he’s also said “I love baby” (he’s never said “I love Mommy or Daddy!”), which pretty much had me in a puddle on the floor. 

He loves to try to play dinosaurs with her, hold her on his lap, lay with her & pretend he’s sleeping, pat her back to help burp her and give her LOTS of kisses right on the lips. He even tried to get me to let her sleep in his bed with him the first night she was home! 

It’s hard to believe how much my smart, perfect and oh so full of love little man has taught me. This is just another one of those times where he’s led the way, knowing all along exactly what to do while I slip and stumble behind him trying to catch up.

Several people have asked how the name “Lately” came to be a name, rather than just a word. Believe it or not, there’s a story behind it. A cheesy, silly, sweet little story that goes something like this…

When Tarrell and I first got together (in those early days of falling in love that became littered with long, long talks, overnight phone calls, childish grins and giggles, endlessly staring headlong into our bright future as one), we were savoring one of our longest talks, hanging on each other’s every word and trying to learn every detail we could possibly learn about each other.

He looked at me with his adorable puffy lips and dimpled smile and said he wanted to know more, but he couldn’t think of another question to ask. He pondered it for a moment then asked, shrugging his shoulders, “What’s your favorite letter?”

I wasn’t quite sure if I had a favorite letter, but after carefully considering my answer, I answered definitively, “L.” I’d always loved the sound it made, it seemed to me like the prettiest letter in the alphabet.

He smiled and followed up quickly with his second question, “What’s your favorite number?” I had the same reaction I’d had to the first question, but again contemplated and decided it was the number 8. (It’s a nice, aesthetically pleasing, symmetrical even number, isn’t it though?).

Without thinking at all, he looked in my eyes and said casually, “If you ever have a daughter, you should name her Lately.” My heart melted, the future I had always hoped for seemed so tangible to me for the first time in my life. I think I knew in that moment that he would be the the love of my life and the father of my children.

The name stuck with us over the years. As we grew closer and realized we wanted to spend our lives together, we would refer to Lately often. She became a constant in our relationship. We would light-heartedly plan our future together and she was always a part of it, she was the symbol of our love and commitment to each other day after day.

Being a mother has been my greatest joy thus far in life, as I knew it would be from a very young age. Meeting my baby boy and watching him grow is my dream come true everyday and having my baby girl is not just icing on the cake, but it truly makes me feel whole in a brand new way. We struggled for two long years to conceive Knox, so when I discovered I had effortlessly become pregnant with Lately I was in disbelief of how blessed we were. And when the ultra-sound technician announced we were having a girl, I squealed with excitement and her name rung through my ears as the tears formed in my eyes.

Since it is so unique, I’m sure people will have their opinions about her name throughout the years, but hopefully she will be able to love it and proudly wear it as the symbol of love that it has become to us over the years.

my love is building a building
around you, a frail slippery
house, a strong fragile house
(beginning at the singular beginning

of your smile)

~e.e. cummings